I believe one of the hardest lifestyle topics to discuss in the Christian church and groups alike is that of sexual sin. It can be a hard balance because not everyone has had the same feelings, trauma, experiences, generational issues and more.
To that I applaud Preston Perry and Jackie Hill Perry for not only taking on this topic but getting very personal with their own account of how porn and sexual dysfunction threatened their marriage. This was the topic in the first two episodes of their new podcast entitled “30 Minutes with The Perrys,” which debuted this month.
They wanted to address this specific topic because they felt these podcasts would “bless other marries couples that sometimes the church fails to discuss.” Preston shared that porn at one point became an emotional support and lust that led him to seek porn when the couple had intimacy issues.
“I was hoping things got better in our intimacy and sex life and felt like God wasn’t hearing my prayers,” Preston shared. On Jackie’s end, she provided context to what may have brought on issues with intimacy in which she was molested in the past and it skewed her view on men and sex.
That with growing up fatherless “solidified lies that I have about men, and what men think about my body, person and identity,” shared Jackie, author of Gay Girl, Good God. She also had experience watching porn at a young age which affected how she thought Preston saw her. She became unwilling to be vulnerable. They both had distorted views of sex and brought them into their marriage.
“Sin is pleasurable, [but] the consequences are never worth it.” – Preston Perry
Preston prayed for this to be taken from him. He was struggling with the shame of the sin. There was an emotional connection that he had with it and mentioned that other men can fill their emotional voids with porn as well.
One thing that we can learn from the first episode is that intimacy is not just about the physical pleasure to men. It is an affirmation for the man and it’s something that women should understand about men. Women need an emotional connection before they even go into intimacy, so rejection in intimacy can affect both spouses in marriage.
In part 2 of the discussion they addressed when Jackie confronted Preston about his porn habit after discovering it on his iPad. “What I needed most to love you well, to forgive you even, and to function in that love was mercy,” Jackie shared on their road to healing.
This podcast is sure to be refreshing and insightful from this Millennial couple doing life together for God’s purpose. Have you spent thirty minutes with The Perrys? Let me know in the comments below!
Ruh-oh. roopsy *insert dog emoji* me thinks this is the first comment here Lolz because This is NOT a popular subject matter. Kudos and Props and Grace and Peace be unto to you for sharing it on your platform. Accountability and accountability circles are important my friend. Taking serious personal development steps forward (imperfectly) can help aid in battling the disease thrown on us by sin and fallen world , our innate desires, and perhaps genetics of our forefathers/mothers. Spiritual development and enrichment courses in this specific arena of spiritual discipline and other areas even might be helpful for all.
Thank you for sharing as we in the Body of Christ are All in the fight for holiness to be sanctified from our past, present, or future sin…day by day….. by His might and our conforming will and desire to be aligned in Christ Jesus’s will and desire. Noticing your triggers as Preston mentioned is a good point!