Black Love Role Models: Kevin and Melissa Fredericks

I’m so excited to have this next couple on B.L.I.S.S. for this year’s Black Love Role Models series! The Fredericks are known online as KevOnStage and MrsKevOnStage, but over their 13+ year marriage, they have supported one another’s individual endeavors and have shared their love lessons in their podcasts and Kevin’s videos. The Fredericks are parents of two sons and shared with us in this post on what it takes to sustain a relationship in the spotlight.

BLISS: Looking back, how did you know it was the right time for you to get married?

Kevin: I knew before Melissa. I remember being in college and planning for life after and I couldn’t think of any option that didn’t include her. That’s when I knew I wanted to be with her forever.

BLISS: What is the importance of supporting each other in your individual purposes/projects?

K: Melissa has supported me from day one. Even when we were dating. She came to more away basketball games than my parents, lol. When I scored my career high 26 points she was there. That support just continued in all my endeavors and it’s paramount. It’s only right that I be right there for her like she has been for me.

“We’ve literally gone from nothing to making a life for ourselves.”

BLISS: People were shook by Mrs. Fredericks’ new ring on social media but as you shared on YouTube it’s more than material. Can you share your glow up story as you both grew in your marriage?

Melissa: We’ve been together since we both started our first job…at fast food restaurants, lol. We’ve literally gone from nothing to making a life for ourselves. There is absolutely nothing wrong with growing together, and in turn reaping the benefits of your labor. Today we have a little bit more than we had 18 years ago, but at the same time, our love has grown over the years as well. Material possessions don’t define our love, but they’re certainly a reminder of how far you’ve come.

K: I don’t know about a glow up. We just have grown up together. We’ve been happy all along the way. She was happy with the tiny ring I first could afford and the one bedroom apartment. She’s also happy with the nicer house and much nicer ring she has now. But I don’t know if we are happier. We’ve always been happy together. If we lost it all and had to go back to one bedroom and no ring, I’m sure we would still be happy.

BLISS: What should couples know before talking about their relationship on social media? 

K: Couples should know that the Internet is forever. Once you post it, it’s there. You can never really delete it. So if you air each other out, please believe screenshots exist. From people you didn’t even know were watching.

M: The funny thing about social media is that it allows you to document your life. Which can be wonderful, the “on this day” feature on Facebook is my favorite. Reminiscing can be great. However, the bad that comes along with it, is that “people” also have insight into your world and they don’t forget. I don’t believe people want to see you fail, but if you do, they’ll use your own post against you. My recommendation is to be mindful that not everything needs to be shared.

BLISS: What is one thing in marriage that singles need to know before they say “I do”?

K: One thing you should know is you can’t marry someone expecting them to change and you can’t marry someone expecting them to stay the same. Be prepared to love them regardless.

M: Don’t expect your spouse to change, and don’t expect anything to stay the same.

“Marriage is about doing life together whatever that may bring.”

BLISS: What is each of your top lesson in creating longevity in marriage?

K: Leave room for growth. People grow and change. Their taste in food, their confidence, their hopes and dreams. Marriage is about doing life together whatever that may bring.

M: Dialogue – leave no room for interpretation.

BLISS: What is your take on Black Love? What does it mean to you both?

K: I think it’s important to combat the stereotypes that marriage is dead and Black fathers aren’t present in the home. The first display of love our children see is our love. It’s going to shape how they view the world.

M: I love, love. But I especially love Black love and what it represents to the Black community. Family is the bedrock of our community and with a great family structure you can build great communities.

BLISS: What is the inspiration behind your Love & Laugh Hour Live Tour? What can audiences expect to experience?

K: Our inspiration was to help couples in their marriage in a fun and lighthearted way. Couples can expect to have a good time and learn from young people who have learned a thing or two.

M: We love encouraging young couples in marriage and sharing words of wisdom we’ve learned along the way. Our hope is that people have a few “ah-ha” moments and that an open dialogue is had after the night is done.

About The Love Hour Podcast: “Kevin & Melissa are a young married couple, bringing you a fresh take on love and relationships. They’re using their 15+ years of marriage experience to offer insight in a relatable way, addressing matters of the heart with plenty of candor, humor, and nuggets of wisdom. Through transparency and honesty, Melissa & Kevin let couples know they aren’t alone in their trials, but that together they can make it through them all!”

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If you haven’t heard, Melissa & Kevin are hosting their first ever Love Hour Conference on July 10-11, 2020! It’s online, so you can watch and engage from home! Get your tickets at thelovehour.com.