What to do if God tells you who your spouse is

Hey BLISS fam! I wanted to discuss this topic in light of recent news of actress Meagan Good and producer DeVon Franklin’s divorce announcement. When I first heard about it in December 2021, I was disheartened about the news and had some thoughts on the matter as well. I remember that Meagan mentioned years ago that before she started dating DeVon, God told her that DeVon was her husband. Today I think about what is it that people can do if they are in that situation, which is a sensitive experience for any single desiring marriage.

If God tells you or if you feel that God has told you that someone you’re interested in is your future spouse, please refrain from telling them that information. Don’t tell them before you start dating; don’t tell them while you’re dating; I recommend keeping that to yourself until maybe the wedding day or even the 50th year anniversary, lol. Some things should just be between you and your holy Father.

Maybe you’ve seen this for yourself: person A moving forward with telling person B that God said that person B is their spouse and it didn’t turn out quite as person A hoped. Either that person ran away or they felt some undue pressure to pursue or stay in the relationship in hopes of “obeying God.” The truth is that regardless of the revelations presented, marrying someone is a choice. We still have free will in terms of choosing a person that we marry, and that revelation gets confirmed to me more and more as I mature. This same free will that God gives us to follow Him, to serve Him, to love Him. God doesn’t make us nor force us to love Him, and He won’t do that with our choice to marry.

Back to the act of telling someone God said they’re your spouse, it may be a premature statement comprised of mixed emotions and circumstances. Consider if you never heard God speak to you in the way that He’s spoken to you until this moment. You hear, sense, or perceive what God has dropped to you. You should probably take a minute to seek that out. If that’s a new way that the Lord is speaking to you, you also want to get confirmation. One reason is because oftentimes with believers, we are hearing our own selves (hearing our egos, flesh, etc.). Other factors include your emotional state, hormones, loneliness, pride, and more.

Then there’s another obvious question, did God relay this same news to the person who’s revealed to be your spouse? I have heard this told me more than once, but I didn’t get the same revelation as the guy I was with. That’s all the more reason to look into the matter before disclosing it with that person of interest. Your emotional state and attraction can seem like a very convincing voice to marry someone, but don’t let that be your guiding force.

God is not the author of confusion, God provides clarity, so that’s another reason to keep that revelation to yourself. If you feel like you need to share it with someone, write it down in the journal or share it with one trusted source that you know is willing to pray for you and with you. You’re going to need clarity to trust God‘s timing and process for revealing things.

One of the downsides of telling someone that God said you’re their spouse is that in the chance that you’ll be wrong or have “missed it” as the saints say. This seems a little extreme, but perhaps it could discredit the move of God and how He speaks to His children. Without God’s wisdom and clarity in revealing certain things at the appropriate time, there can be a lot of confusion and leading people astray. Taking your time can help prevent that.

Some of these prophecies that you may get, a word that you may get from the Lord, some impression that He may put on your heart, should be kept to yourself. Before running to tell anyone that revelation, seek God and wait for His answer because that’s what a relationship with God looks like–it’s talking to Him and waiting for His response and moving when He responds.

It’s a beautiful thing to get confirmation from the Lord regarding relationships and who to pursue, but ultimately it is our choice. We have plenty of help to make these choices: the experience, tools, wisdom, and tight-knit circle that God has put in our lives. The Father won’t lead you astray, but you have to be willing to follow His ways. The Book of Proverbs, for instance, gives us plenty of examples of how we can get wisdom, understanding, knowledge, and success not only in every day life things, but in relationships. I encourage you to not go about this relationship journey by yourself. If you feel like God has told you that someone is your spouse, that’s something you need to Selah on and not shout about just yet.

Hey BLISS fam! Have you or someone you know ever experienced God telling you that someone is your spouse? Share below!